Ten Shades of Red
by ManateeFace
Summary: Everyone says you can turn "ten shades of red". Sai finally explains it to Naruto. Disaster can strike in the simplest and most innocent of ways  ;D Disclaimer: I own NOTHING.


Naruto walked along the crowded streets of Konoha at a steady pace. He stared distractedly at the ground, as if he wasn't all there, but in his own world. It was obvious that he was deep in thought, but about what, who knew?

Sai watched him pass by from a rooftop and jumped down to ask him what was wrong, as this was very unusual behavior for Naruto. Usually, no matter where he went, Naruto went with a cheery smile at a run, or jog. When Sai landed in front of him, Naruto looked up, startled for a moment, but relaxed seeing who it was.

"What do you want?" he growled.

"Nothing," Sai said in his monotone voice, "Just wondering why you look all down."

"I'm not sad!" Naruto said exasperatedly, "Well, today I was reading," he stopped at Sai's sharp intake of breath. "Well if you're going to be like that, you don't need to know, I guess."

"No, go on," Sai said, actually curious.

"Well, as I said, I was reading," Naruto glared to prevent any reaction, "and someone in my book mentioned somebody else turning 'ten shades of red'. Would you, by chance, have read anything having to do with what that means?" Naruto looked up with a combination of hope and embarrassment etched upon his face.

"Actually, yes, I have."

A silence fell between the two. They kept walking, puffs of dirt emanating from under their sandals after each footstep.

"Well?" Naruto impatiently inquired.

"Look, there's Sakura," Sai said. The rosette indeed was coming out of Yamanaka Flower Shop, the bell tinkling behind her as she left.

Naruto looked excitedly at her, but then shook his head. "If that's your way of getting out of telling me, it's not going to work. Not this time."

"No, actually this'll help your figure out what it means. I'll show you."

Sai whispered something into Naruto's ear.

"Okay, I'll go do it, " Naruto said. He then walked purposefully towards Sakura, Sai trailing two or three feet behind.

"Hey, Sakura-chan!"

"What? Oh, hey, Naruto."

"Sakura-chan, you're fat, ugly, I see no reason as to why Sasuke would **ever** like you, and you're bound to be a failure as a ninja and at life in general," Naruto finished with a smile, sure now that he would be able to know what turning ten shades of red meant.

Sai appeared behind Naruto, just as Sakura began taking in everything Naruto had insulted her with. Sai pointed at at Sakura's reddening face and said, "Pink," totally calm and unaware of his impending doom.

Once Sakura had fully processed everything, she reddened further more and began to frown. Sai pointed once more at her angry face and said, "Magenta."

Naruto just nodded at Sai, not realizing the whole of what he had just said to Sakura. He also was totally oblivious to his slightly obvious impending doom, the same as Sai. Sai said, "Red-violet."

Sakura's face was indeed getting rather blotchy at that point, her eyes widened to their full potential and the furrow in her brow deeper than ever. Sai just monotonously said, as if this were perfectly normal, "Red."

Sai seemed undisturbed by the hated Sakura was practically pouring out, directly to Naruto. He also failed to realize that part of it was directed at him. He said, "Brick red."

Naruto stood there, glancing back and forth from Sai to Sakura as if he were at an interesting museum exhibit or sports game. Sai said, "Maroon."

Sakura was glaring at Naruto the worst she could and her face was so red it looked as if she was holding her breath or being choked. Sai inspected Sakura's face and, after a second, decided to give the next color, "Dark red."

When Naruto glanced back at Sakura he saw that she was now glaring daggers at Sai also. Sai still just calmly stated, "Crimson."

Sakura's ever- darkening face was angrier than Naruto had ever seen it, including the time Sakura had asked him to water her plants while she was gone. Needless to say, he had failed miserably, gone to the hospital, and had to buy her all new kitchen appliances (dishwasher, sink, oven, microwave, etc.). Naruto shuddered at the thought. Sai said, "Purple."

Naruto was getting a bit scared now. Sakura looked as if she would start yelling any second now. She took a breath as if to start, but was hurriedly cut off by Sai's last announcement, "Puce."

"Is this you guys' sick idea of a joke?" I have feelings you know! Sai, you idiot, did you trick Naruto into saying that? Naruto, how in the WORLD could you BELIEVE him?"

She punched them both, sending them flying into the nearest vendor's stand. Watermelons cascaded on top of them as the vendor cried out. Just as Naruto was edging out from under the rubble, Sakura grabbed his wrist and yanked him out. She did the same with Sai.

She punched and kicked them both until they were covered in bruises. Naruto, staggering out from beneath another unsuspecting vendor's cart, wondered aloud, "I thought we were learning ten shades of red, not black and blue." Sai and Sakura both glared at him. He gulped.

Poor Naruto.

**Like it? Poor Naruto. Victim of circumstance... I had this story written a while ago but never typed it. I also already have 2 sequels written down, but not typed. I was just wondering, do you really turn ten shades of red when you're mad/embarrassed? Please review, it'll give me the motivation to type out my next two sequels. (Turning Green and Why so Blue?) -ManateeFace**


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